Love Versus Infatuation

There is a book by Gordon O. Martinborough simply entitled "I LOVE YOU". It is a book that deals on how to deal on the struggles of relationships - marriage, parent-teen relationship, love affair. It is a book that best connects human relationships with the Divine relationships with God. When our relationship with God is in trouble, definitely our human relationships are or will be in great danger, as well. It also deals with ways on how to deepen our love relationship with the Greatest Lovern Jesus Christ who loved us before we loved Him.
There is a chapter in this book that differentiates infatuation from love. Everyone of us seek for genuine love and the most common question is "could that ever be true love?" And being human at times we will develops crushes/infatuation ...the teaching in the book helps us test our feelings for someone and helps us identify our feelings as either infatuation or love, when we know its infatuation we then know we need to face it, deal with and move on and if it is indeed love seek God's counsel and direction till we get clearance from God.

1. Infatuation is ruled by feelings, but LOVE is feelings ruled by principle

Love is not composed of feelings only. It is feelings plus principles. In true love, feelings are under the control of principles. The principles are clearly asserted and outlined in the book of Corinthians chapter 13.

Read Corinthians 13:4-7
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

"Love never fails" (v.8)

2. Infatuation is blind, but LOVE sees and examines

While infatuation cannot see and do not wish too see, true love uses its eyes to see and to examine the strengths and weaknesses of the prospective partner.

Read Mark 8:18

"Do you have eyes, but fail to see."

3. Infatuation is in a hurry, but LOVE takes time

Everything of a permanent value in life takes time. As the famous line goes... true love takes time - time to know and time to grow.

Read Ephesians 4:15
"But speaking truth in love, we may grow up in all things into him, who is the head, even Christ"

God expects couples in love to "grow-up".

4. Infatuation is obsessed with externals, but LOVE is concerned with internals

True love is concerned with the personality, the kind of person the partner really is. It pays attention to the character, the inner self. While there has to be attraction ...true love is not only concerned with the triceps and biceps and coca cola shaped Beyonce typed figures as these are temporary.

Read 1 Samuel 16:1

"Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."


5. Infatuation is childish, but LOVE is mature

Infatuation is self-centered but true love is "other-centered". This is one of the most difficult thing to do because we tend to focus on ourselves, on our emotions, and wants. But love is concerned with the welfare of one's partner. It is a self-sacrifice that is given freely without expecting something in return.

Read 1 Corinthians 13:11

It has "put childish ways behind."

6. Infatuation is a human ditch but
LOVE is a divine ladder
It should be clear to us that we do not "fall" in love, we "climb" on to love. Every person has the freedom to choose between the tragedy of one and the triumph of the other! In most cases of arguments, it is important that one goes down, the other goes up.